the enchanter

I don't know if anybody visits here to read any more, but maybe I will come back at it.. give it a makeover and add a couple links about me and stuff.
I just realized how boring my life is and how unspecial it is. I guess it is really hard for anybody to accept the rude, hard truth about himself/herself and his/her own life. Maybe I'll make it *look* as though it *was* special by make-over-ing this place? Hmm? :D

Anyway, for my old friends like Gary who MIGHT be dropping by any time (please get in touch, unless your house has been blown up), Carl has moved to Toronto and we are having a great time. As individuals, though, I wonder if it's the best for either of us. But that's beside the point, because I will be leaving in a few weeks and he is starting school in the fall also. We are very happy when we are together and we are very supportive of each other....

I just realized by now I have no real friend :o It's a pathetic feeling when I remind myself of that my very exclusive adoration for my boyfriend is due to having no one else to turn to? Or maybe that's how everyone feels and why everyone wants and needs a special "other".

Is it not funny that you cannot write one word down unless you think your thought is somehow special... my problem is that I find so little of my thoughts worth sharing. It is a very degrading feeling. Yet I am typing seventy words a minute, so, hm, yes, there, another truth of "human nature", the paradox, the irony.

I think I will ..
wait, I just remembered.. when I first strated blogging I thought no one would be reading it.. :D a reason why I could feel comfortable typing out things.. on the other hand, there was the secret hope that someone, somewhere, some time, will be reading what I've written, which was a kind of a relieving feeling. So I guess I will get back at writing on here. Yes, maybe I will.

Summer's started... and the excitement is boiling.